From Joy to Just Tired: Surviving Wedding Overload

As my wedding date slowly approaches, I am increasingly irritated about decision-making. I've heard the tales of how stressful wedding planning can be, but now, as I am going through it myself, I realize it's a bigger headache than I imagined. My biggest issue is my lack of desire to make even the smallest decisions. I am trying my best to avoid wedding talk. I've recently learned that I have what the laymen call decision fatigue, and boy, is it nice to have a name for my lack of wanting to do anything wedding-related.

After a long day of deciding what to wear to work, what healthy lunch I will eat, and how much effort I want to put into my day at work, I have very little energy for what centerpieces I prefer for my reception. But ultimately a decision must be made and unless I want to show up on my wedding day thinking what the fuck did I do, I'm going to have to step up to the plate.

My first step in overcoming decision fatigue is recognizing the signs of it. My second step is finding ways to cope with everything, and then finally, I hope and pray that everything works out. Or I'm at least drunk enough not to care on my wedding day.

After already putting in a few months of wedding prep, I'm starting to recognize the signs of decision fatigue. My signs include impulsive decision making, irritability, feeling overwhelmed, and my favorite, procrastination. I soon became easily annoyed after booking the venue, finding the dress, picking the wedding colors, and paying a shockingly large florist bill. In a short time after annoyance kicked in, I began to procrastinate. I would shut down immediately when any wedding discussion occurred between me and my fiancé. While I found comfort in avoidance, I know I would soon be overwhelmed if I kept pushing off my many to-do lists.

So, what have I done to overcome this ailment? I, for one, implemented a few new coping mechanisms. Though I'm unsure if you can call this a coping mechanism, I first hired a wedding planner. I figured one way to help me from feeling overwhelmed was to remove as many choices as possible from this process. My wedding planner has provided a list of recommendations of trusted vendors, allowing me to limit the amount of research I need to do. They sent me a few vendor suggestions, and I chose my favorite from there. A decision still must be made, but with less effort.

Another step I have taken to relieve some wedding stress is delegating tasks to my… fiancé. I know it's risky, but it's a price I am willing to pay. For example, I let my fiancé plan the dress rehearsal party. Though he had to verify a couple of clarifying questions with me, I let him take the lead, and it was a weight off my shoulders.

I also plan to make my most significant and most daunting decision on a Saturday or Sunday morning when I have minimal choices to make. Usually, my only concern is what time I want to go to the gym, so I'm usually more open to discussing wedding plans. Another vital element that has been on my side is time. My fiancé and I chose a wedding date a year and a half out from our engagement, which ultimately allows enough time to plan, stress, recharge, and plan again.

While I am super excited to celebrate my love for my fiancé with my friends, family, and a hefty price tag, I can't wait until all this wedding planning and decision-making is behind me!